Be like the wheel, my friend. Squeak for your grease!

I am the squeakiest wheel, as visitors to this blog will, no doubt, notice.

I find that maintaining a positive attitude is the best way to get things done. However, I eschew that kind of crystal-gripping, new age, hippie nonsense almost immediately, as I've also found that bitching and moaning is the best way to get other people to get things done for you.

We can't help it; this behavior/reward stuff has been ingrained in us since we were children, and it's hardly a new philosophy. "Ask, and ye shall receive," is just a fancy of way saying, "Have it your way."

We -- as in, humanity -- really are a bunch of whiners and complainers, and bloggers are the worst. Actually, bike bloggers are even worse than that. We're always looking for some cause to get behind, or some way to complain about the status quo. See here, for example, where I ask you to whine to your local legislators to get more funding for biking infrastructure in Pennsylvania.

If anything, it's cathartic. The road being a mess, for example, is something so out of my control that I have no choice but to complain about it. I could simply accept it, and move on with my life, but that doesn't make me feel any better and the problem is still there! So, I complain. But there's another reason, and that is because we, as citizens, have an obligation to demand that our elected officials -- the people we put in charge to get stuff done -- actually get stuff done!

Well, I'm not about to sit here and say that my nimble fingers tapping against a keyboard actually did one iota of good towards fixing the bridge -- I'm sure finishing it was in the schedule, all along -- but my ride was smooth and bump-free, today. As Axl Rose once observed, all we need is a little patience.

Now that I mention it, Axl Rose kind of cements the whole point of this blog post, which is that, if you complain -- and especially if you make a good show of it -- not only do you get what you want, but people actually make you a rock star because of it. Sorry, positive thinkers! Throwing a hissy fit doesn't just feel good, it makes you famous!

Here's the thing: I own up about my whining. When I make a complaint, and that complaint gets a positive response, I stop, and say, "Thank you!" Thank you, to all the road construction crews and maintenance workers out there who keep the roads smooth and even. You rock!

In closing, let the rabble-rousers raise rabble! Flip a table! Clench your fists and stomp your feet! Roll around on the ground and hold your breath until you're blue in the face! We're just trying to make the world a better place, damnit! Why is that so hard to understand? Life is unfair! You're not my real dad! WHY DOES EVERYTHING BAD ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME? #FML


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